Archive for April, 2011

Stuff That (Most) People Hate, or, In the Alternative, Stuff That (Most) People Strongly Dislike

Posted in Uncategorized on April 29, 2011 by ctgalaw

With The Recovering Attorney Blog being the UN-BLOG(tm) I really should not step my rather large big toe into the rapid, rabid waters of American politics.  There are many worthy blogs and newspapers that intelligently handle the daily comings and goings of all things political. 

But I just.  I must.  I gotta wade in the water.  I think you know where I am going . . .Now I can post a missive decrying the sociopolitical events of April 27, 2011.  But I will exercise restraint.  Many respected commentators have handled the matter with the dignity and aplomb that I have come to expect.  However, like many I have had the conversations, commented on blogs, I have read the comments of others and I have had to explain the true meaning of the events to Precious Child II.  I thought that I was done.  I thought that the sadness (yes, sadness) had subsided.  I thought that the remnants of my anger (yes, anger) was put to rest when I had that extra-wide slice of chocolate cake after my healthy salmon entrée.  But I was soooo wrong.

Because I refer to The Recovering Attorney Blog as among other things modern, I got to get my $0.02 in before,  given the nature of the American news cycle, this sociopolitical event becomes–history– albeit unpleasant history:

Stuff  That Most People (okay me) Dislike (“Hate” is such a strong word)

1.  Double Standards

2.  Uneven Playing Fields (Not a good thing in soccer or in life)

3.  Fasle Pride

4.  Feigned Equality

5.  Feigned Innocence

6.  Feigned Tolerance

7.  Feigned Intelligence

8.  Disguised Bigotry (I prefer to know a person’s “politics.”  “Own” it.  It just makes life easier)

9.  Bigotry

10.  Liars, Lies AND Slanderous Statements

11.  Ignorance

12.  Blowhards AND Buffoons

13.  Carnival Barkers ( I apologize to all of the certified, authorized, legitimate, hard-working carnival barkers–so not all barkers)

14.  Clowns (please see #13)

15.  Orange “Tans”

16.  Shameless (endless) Self-Promoters

17.  Hair Comb-Overs

18.  New Yorkers originally from one of the “Outer Boroughs” who lack the confidence to “own” that fact (me, Manhattan born and raised)

19.  Racists AND

20.  Donald John Trump. 

And for the record, like many native New Yorkers, you could not sell and or give  me a Trump condo, bottle of Trump water (I believe no longer in production), membership in a Trump golf club or a Trump necktie (made in China necktie, BTW).   And that was before the unfortunate events of April 27, 2011.  Ha!

COPYRIGHT 2011.  The Recovering Attorney Blog.  All Rights Reserved.  And I will sue.  Ha!


Overheard In A Reception Area . . ., or, A Very Busy Morning

Posted in Uncategorized on April 27, 2011 by ctgalaw

(I have a very busy morning.  So no extended narrative today.  But post I must because I truly believe and know in my heart that  you are addicted to The Recovering Attorney Blog (“tongue in cheek” tone–I am confident not narcissistic).  I mean really.   Where else on the www. can you read the musings of a modern, stylish, (over) indulgent, fortysomething former lawyer who fired herself  (please see the “About The Recovering Attorney” section); has led a very interesting life–I have only just begun to share, who offers her insight on life, personal growth, reconnection, reinvention, her spouse and children and then has the audacity to refer to her blog as the   UN-BLOG(TM)?  Only an attorney I tell you.  Ha!)

The Actual Post

While waiting on  a line when on an airplane, or in the reception area of an office, I have a penchant for casually tuning into other people’s public (No.  I don’t snoop, use wire tapping devices, nor do I secretly record ) conversations.   People just have very interesting conversations–and some snippets are worth repeating:

“New York  is a sink or swim city.  Some people just have larger life jackets then others”

“If homeboy thinks that he can speak better *prep boy speech* than me–please!”

“He is so disagreeable that he complains that the ice cubes are too crunchy”

“I dropped the F bomb; no one got hurt.  I was just expressing myself…why is it called a bomb?

“Let’s not and say that we did”

“He never pays his way.  He is always asking for a ride or borrowing money from me–heck, his new nickname is Luggage because I am always carrying him”

I am sure that you have heard excellent snippets as well.  Feel free to share.

Many thanks,

The Recovering Attorney

COPYRIGHT 2011.  The Recovering Attorney Blog.  All Rights Reserved.  And I will sue.  Ha!

Off-Topic Tuesday,or, Homeward Bound and Found

Posted in Uncategorized on April 26, 2011 by ctgalaw

 (The Recovering Attorney and Family Spring Break Photo)

“Get Out And See The World, Take A Vacation, Travel” . . .Yes!  It reads well in glossy magazines.  Women of a certain age are admonished to leave the nest if only for a short while to regroup, reconnect and recover:   A girlfriend only retreat at a secluded, rustic, yet luxurious spa ( I am thinking Arizona or New Mexico).  Or a daring solo trip to a far-flung exotic location where you re-learn how to Eat, Love and Pray. 

Well for my money and at this stage in my “recovery,”  that exhort to travel and see the world is immediately tampered by all of the stuff that I have to get done in preparation for my sojourn  AND all of the personal stuff that must accompany said sojourn. 

What does a worn flat pillow, a couple of bags of Trader Joes’s mixed nuts and dried fruits, a few fresh fruits, coconut water, a tub of shea butter, a vial each of coconut and rosemary oil, calcium chews, biotin and fish oil tablets and a woman’s daily multi-vitamin, my prescribed acne medication (*sigh* adult acne is a chore) and the __________and the___________and I can’t forget the________! all have in common?  The preceding are just a few of the things that I must pack in order to 1. stay regular, 2. have a good night sleep, and 3. literally feel comfortable in my skin.  I recall not so long ago when all I needed for a trip was a practically empty suitcase.  Those days are gone.

To be honest (and as The Recovering Attorney, “Ownership” and “Honesty” should really be my hyphenated names) at this stage in my life travel is quickly losing its allure (shh–don’t tell my mom–she just might think that she has failed as a mother.  Ha!).  I don’t care if I am packing the rear of the SUV headed to the beach for the weekend or if it’s a get- out- the- passport- and- upload- the- new -translator- application- on- the- smart phone- trip. . . 

Too much work I tell you.  I remember in my younger motherhood when Precious Children I and II were both under the age of ten.  I had to pack diapers, “stuffies,” bath toys, special snacks and the___________and the_____________and dare I forget the____________!   History sure has a way of repeating itself.

The Mandarin Hotels (and their cohorts) can keep its rich Asian inspired decor and its discreet butlers–for now, today, HOME is my final destination– the destination I covet.  And The Dog is always eagerly, faithfully awaiting my return.

Disclaimer:  Above stated position subject to change on a whim–probably as soon as next week–I bore easy and a get away is always a great mood changer!

COPYRIGHT 2011.  The Recovering Attorney Blog.  All Rights Reserved.  And I will sue.  Ha!

Diamonds, Pearls, Pipe Cleaners, or, “Your Signature…Please”

Posted in Uncategorized on April 25, 2011 by ctgalaw

For some women it’s a signet ring perhaps inherited from a favorite great-aunt.  For certain women it’s a pair of classic diamond stud earrings received as a “just because” gift from your husband or favorite guy.  Or perhaps it’s an inherited watch from Grandfather or a charm bracelet given to you by your husband and children–of course the charms depicting your most dearest favorite things in the whole wide world.  Be it Grandmother’s pearls, a trendy golf ball size ring, a vintage watch, funky of- the- moment silver cable designer earrings (cable bracelet, cable necklace, cable ring…you know of what I write), a stone encrusted pin, a mommy bracelet fashioned out of a purple pipe cleaner made by your little one, or a simple 18 carat gold necklace purchased in a consignment boutique–all of these items can serve as your signature piece.  A piece that all who come in contact with you at the market on Monday will find on your person at the networking event on Friday.   It’s a piece that you are known for.  A piece an item that becomes your Signature.

When I think of women who commit to wearing  signature pieces, I think of consistent, steadfast, confident (oh, dare I say “hot” women– please see preceding post).  These women can be of a certain age or young moms.    Women who are comfortable in their skin AND in their surroundings.  These women would not care if they were attending a certain royal wedding or serving as a “mommy chaperone” on their child’s field trip to the park–that signature piece would grace their neck, ears, arm or finger.

To me there is a certain confidence that exudes from such a woman.  She is not at all troubled that her brilliant super-sized diamond stud or hoop earrings may appear a tad much when picnicking with 8 year olds.    Nor is she bothered that her vintage slightly worn male Patek Philippe watch may be a bit out of place for the uber- elegant black tie event.  The watch is invited because it’s her signature piece. 

I have stated early and often on The Recovering Attorney Blog about my loovvee of jewelry.  This love of jewelry is in my DNA.   Came by it honestly.  My maternal grandfather often told me of his mother, a small woman, who was so fond of her “trinkets” (her words) that she would wear her trinkets every.where.  To the grocer, to sit in the sun, to dig in her small garden.  My mother inherited the gene and she took the family trait one step further.   When I was young my mother had her own jewelry designer, Charles.   Today, she has many custom, commissioned “they don’t make them like that anymore” pieces (all tucked safely away) as well as a  lot of current designer pieces.  Suffice it to say– I can spot a quality one- of- a- kind piece from across a crowded room–coming of age in Manhattan during the 80’s– it was something I did for kicks!  Fine  jewelry has always been a part of my life much to the dismay of Mr. Recovering Attorney.  So. Yeah.  I have a Signature.  However. . .

With this new evolving, reconnecting and recovering me, I am seriously considering adopting a new Signature piece.  Something that says:  The Recovering Attorney.  Perhaps a charm depicting the scales of justice with a line slashed through the middle (perhaps not–far too many inferences), or perhaps a funky, original Rachel Stewart piece (if only she worked with precious metals and stones–if it’s going to be a signature piece I need durability–a commission might work. ) to celebrate my “new” sans chemical hair. 

(Or perhaps my hair can serve as my signature.  I don’t know.  Just a thought.  Style blogger Tamara Styles of GetItGirlStyle ( ),  from my perspective, has a unique signature–her flattering, stylish short-cropped hair–to me that’s her signature.   A signature that she “owns” and flaunts–well!  Click, see and enjoy for yourself– while visiting you can enjoy her eye and you might recognize a certain blogger)

Not unlike Suze Orman and her ubiquitous earrings, I’m also going for the gold–or perhaps silver, platinum, diamonds, pearls or pipe cleaners–The Recovering Attorney’s new signature piece or look.  I will keep you posted.  What about you Dear Readers.  Do you have a Signature? 

COPYRIGHT 2011.  The Recovering Attorney.  All Rights Reserved.  And I will sue.  Ha!

Re-Post: Sex and the City or What Makes a Woman Hot?

Posted in Uncategorized on April 22, 2011 by ctgalaw

Weekends at home are always Frenetic and Fun at the home of The Recovering Attorney.  But weekends away–are always extra!  So no time for new content.    But because I love my Dear Readers:  *THIS IS THE RE-POST*.  Please re-enjoy! 

And a Happy Easter, Happy Passover and Happy Spring Nights and Days to All.  SEE YOU DEAR READERS ON MONDAY!

I have a confession to make.  I just watched the movie, Sex and the City.  As of yesterday its official.   I am no longer a Sex and the City virgin.  I recall the Friday that the movie opened.  I was still a “practicing” attorney.  I had an afternoon appointment with a young thirtysomething attorney from the opposing side.  “We” were negotiating with her employer.  I eagerly (she did not know this of course) agreed to meet at her offices, the world headquarters of CNN.  Hey, why not?  I just might run into T.J. Holmes (ha! to the blogger, The Black Snob)!  You never know.  Anywhooooo.  After having my photo taken, my driver’s license scrutinized, going through a metal detector, waiting in the lobby for an escort, going up a long escalator (I think that ride doubled as a FBI observational behavioral study for visitors–checking for nervousness, heavy perspiration and the like) and having my handbag and briefcase physically searched by an armed Atlanta police officer before being allowed to enter the elevators to travel up to CNN’s legal offices, I was ready for this hardball meeting.  Right? Right.  Well. No.  After dispensing with the business at hand (“we” prevailed!) the “younger” attorney and I began to have an “unbusiness” conversation. ( You heard it here first–unbusiness conversation).  She told me that she was newly engaged and that  after work her girlfriends were going to take her to see Sex and the City to kick off her newly betrothed status.  I congratulated her, I truly wished her well; told her that I too planned on seeing the movie that weekend.  Needless to say I did not see the movie.  In fact, during the first year of the movie’s release, I traveled to Europe, the Caribbean and across the country and I did not view the movie in flight, nor did I order the movie for home viewing.  Why bother?  I did not see the movie within its first weeks.  All the critics had weighed in and I knew the outcome.  No harm.  No foul.  If asked, I knew enough about the movie to engage in an intelligent conversation (yes, 3 years ago there was intelligent conversation about the movie).  Well I was bored last night.  I watched some of the Jets-Steeler game.  Did some surfing and stumbled upon Sex and the City

My take on the movie.  You heard it all before.  The setting was to swoon for.  With New York City, my hometown, as the backdrop, one just can’t go wrong.  The street scenes, the vibrancy of the city.  The real estate.  That apartment.  The cinematography.  The fashions.  The plot?  Eh.  However, notwithstanding the recent commentary of the comedian Ricky Gervais at the Golden Globe Awards, you have to admit that the four women (including Jennifer Hudson), all over the age of 40, translated well on the big screen.  In a word they were HOT.  True, there’s special lighting, stylists, make-up artist, couture fashion and a script (yes, they are actors) to assist them in pulling off the look of the sophisticated, urbane, stylish New Yorker (hey—that was me before I moved to Atlanta in the mid-1990s–no regrets, no regrets, no regrets . . .), but that’s movie making Dear Readers and we love it.  However, we mere mortals must not despair.  We may not travel with a glam squad, or a script writer offering us witty dialogue on cue, but we can and do hold our own.  All you need is the attitude and the confidence and the rest is easy.

I am curious.  What makes a woman “hot? (Shhh.  Don’t tell Precious Child II that I used the word “hot” to refer to a woman, please.  Thanks.)  Allow me to go first: 

1.  Confidence.

2.  Confidence

3.  Did I say Confidence?

4.  Intelligence and Wit.

5.  Gravitas

6.  A banging body (Shhhh don’t tell Precious Child I that I used the word “banging” to refer to a woman’s form).

7.  If the body is not to her liking, then she wears clothing to complement her form.

8.  Fabulous accessories (handbags, jewelry, shoes, hats, scarves—it’s all in the accessories).

9.  A piece of statement jewelry that becomes the woman’s signature.

10.  Well coiffed hair.  Natural or chemically treated hair.

11.  An emergency monetary fund.

12.  A retirement plan/account (even if she is a twentysomething).

13.  A valid passport ( a hot woman should never walk away from an opportunity to travel solely because her passport has expired).

What say you Dear Readers?  Do engage!

COPYRIGHT 2011.  The Recovering Attorney.  All Rights Reserved.  And I will sue.  Ha!

You Mean I Can’t Have It All?…Life Is So Unfair!

Posted in Uncategorized on April 21, 2011 by ctgalaw

I was asked a question the other day that has been in my head for a minute.  I did not answer the question.  Not because I did not want to answer.  I did not answer the question because in that moment and in that place I simply could not.

One of the first things that you are taught in law school is:  If you don’t have an answer to a question never ever answer with an “I don’t know” or worse  feign an answer.  You reply with an “I will get back to you” and you quickly go find the answer!  Law School 101.  This strategy has served me well over the years.  But I digress. . .

The question asked of me was straight forward, honest, simple and yet powerful:  What are you free from today that may have held you hostage when you were younger?  Even when I see the question again unspoken detached and flat on my computer screen I still say, WOW!

Well I have given the question some thought and my answer today April 21, 2011 is:  I am free from believing the lies that many of us were taught to embrace as truth during our youth.     However, the “lie” that I accepted and embraced “early and often” was the “you can have it all” lie.  So.Not.True.

*Commercials, self-help books, songs, movies tell us repeatedly that we can have everything in life we ever dreamed of–Please!–there is not one single person who has ever had it all.  And there is a simple reason why:  Every yes is a no, and every no is a yes.  Allow me.  When you go to a restaurant, the waiter does not ask you if you are having the entire menu.  You are asked what entrée are you having out of all of the entrees on the menu.  The waiter is asking what are you saying yes to on the menu.  If you are saying yes to the lamb, you are saying no to the steak, fish and everything else on the menu.  That’s life.  If you are lucky life is like a menu that you get to choose from, but saying yes to being a huge success at work usually means saying no to getting home by six and being able to live a balanced life.  Not always, but usually, for most of us.  The point being that no one has ever had it all because whenever a person says yes to something they are inescapably saying no to something else!

The you can have it all lie has indeed held me hostage during my younger years.  No. More!  By ridding myself of that lie I am now free to surrender from all of the guilt, anxiety and frustration that such a lie breeds.  I can’t have it all and that’s just fine by me. (but plesase tell me that life is fair, please.  Ha!).  For now I am having what I want.  Here.  With The Recovering Attorney Blog.  And for that I am grateful.

Are you free from something today that held you hostage when you were younger?

*The Lies We Believe by Chris Thurman, PhD.  1999.

COPYRIGHT 2011.  The Recovering Attorney.  All Rights Reserved.  And I will sue.  Ha!

Off -Topic Tuesday, or, The Recovering Attorney is on Topic with the new “About Me” Profile!

Posted in Uncategorized on April 19, 2011 by ctgalaw

The Recovering Attorney Blog is finally getting to look a lot like a real blog.  I know.  I know. I have a way to go, but baby steps Dear Readers, baby steps.   This is a big deal for me.  If someone would have just whispered that I would be on the www. “sharing” –please!  Not the kid.  Family and friends know me to be almost pathologically (is that a word?)  private (Family and friends don’t even know about The Recovering Attorney Blog–that’s how private I am.).  But like I said.  Recover, Reinvent and Unwind. 

As promised, “The Recovering Attorney” profile has been added.  So now all I need to do is get a Facebook account, open a Twitter account, look into Tumblr (what’s that again?- note to self, “call” yes, I said “call,” Precious Child I for a briefing on Tumblr) and start vloging.  It’s all coming.  But baby steps, baby steps…

Many thanks,

The Recovering Attorney

COPYRIGHT 2011.  The Recovering Attorney.  All Rights Reserved.  And I will sue.  Ha!